Time for a New System?

time for a new system

 A crack of white along the binding, a slightly bowed cover, and wrinkled ribbon page markers- the only outward signs of my daily documentation in the hardcover journal.  There are only four pages left.  I’m surprised it isn’t in worse shape. 

The journal is the perfect size to slip in a work bag or carry in a stack of books. 

Its Nordic Blue cover is leather-like, smooth but soft.  Any sleeker and it would slip from my hands.  

A slim pen, stationed in the matching elastic loop, waits to X the circles and boxes drawn in front of daily, weekly and monthly tasks.  Its black ink scrawled across the cream pages.  Insight and inspiration alongside appointments and reminders.  The profound.  The mundane.

A sticker on the cover, it’s colors perfectly coordinated, asks me to “Be the change you wish to see in the world.”  After fourteen months, I’m ready for a new journal.

I started bullet journaling a few years ago. An experiment in melding my home obligations, work expectations, and the spontaneous hits of inspiration or insight. I kept it simple. No frills, fancy lettering, or forays down the Pinterest rabbit hole where it would be easy to get stuck comparing my methods.

Simple, or my perfectionist nature could easily find my version of journalling/planning lacking in charm and creativity.

Half of the pages in this blue journal chronicle the ideas and projects important when I first opened the cover. Now these pages feel irrelevant. The goals I had set in early 2020, the aspirations, the big plans, were paused and then thrown out. There are pages full of events and to-dos erased by dark slashes. Boxes of hand-drawn calendars sit empty.

No work. No events. No plans.

The months from April to July all blur together. I don’t think I picked up the journal some days, knowing there was nothing of real purpose to track, my only goal – find a way to get groceries and keep from melting down.

And now, the pages are full and I’m wondering if it’s time to rethink this method. Do I throw out a tool that was essential in keeping me organized when life felt so full and I was determined to keep everything moving forward? Have I outgrown bullet journalling or like so many things, is this just on pause? Could I offer a new blank journal the space and time to become useful in a new way?

Whatever I decide, I know it’s time to put the old journal to rest and honor where I am now – living and breathing – regardless of whether I make a checklist or not.

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Kate Buckmeier

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