Replace comparison with curiosity & inspiration

comparison is the thief of joyThis week the same phrase keeps running through my head.

“Comparison is the thief of joy.”

Over and over… again and again.

I understand why it is haunting me.  I need to hear it.  I need the gentle reminder that when I start to make comparisons, even simple ones, it takes away from me.  It makes a question mark stand out about how my life is or how it stacks up.

Comparison takes the joy out of what is and pulls out the attitude of “oh, I wish” or “isn’t that neat”  or “why can’t I do that?” or “how does she do that?”

It is a simple thing and it happens all the time.

It’s automatic.

It creates a wishing or longing that comes from the head, not the contentment that the heart could feel if those simple thoughts were kept in check a bit more.

There are so many different ways to live in this world.  So many ways to look at life.  So many possibilities and ideas that become important or inspiring.  It’s unique for each person.  There really isn’t a need to compare.

I will continue to shift and focus on finding joy and gratitude in my interactions with people, looking at their circumstances with wonder and awe, letting comparison fall away.

I want to find inspiration and hope in what people choose and how they live.  I want to feel the joy of living my life.

I am going to let that phrase continue to run through my head for as long as it needs to.  And I’d like to add another- “I am enough.”

Your Turn…

Is there a phrase that keeps circling through your thoughts or an attitude that you can’t seem to shake?  What is it asking you to shift or look into a bit further?

Next Steps…

So often when comparison creeps in it bring along feelings of shame & embarrassment about our current situation.  I often see this when I am invited into a new space.  Disclaimers are given before I reach to open the closet door or am allowed to see the overflowing cabinet.

When these feelings start to overwhelm you, offer yourself the reminder that “comparison is the thief of joy.”  Your life is unique, your situation is unique, your solutions will be unique.  Get curious about how you can create changes that work for YOU!  Look to social media & friends for inspiration, but remember that you need solutions & systems that take into account your personality, lifestyle, temperament.

There is no “one-size-fits-all” solution for living.  Let’s let comparison go & begin to enjoy our uniqueness.

Talking out your wants & desire without comparison is important.  Sign up for a Clarity Session and together we will take a look at your spaces with non-judgment & with a heavy dose of curiosity to uncover how they could begin to uniquely support you!

Sections of this post were taken from my personal blog “Breathing Spaces & More”

But it is worth so much… I can’t just give it away!

I have heard these words over and over, “But this piece is worth a lot of money!  I can’t just give it away!” 

It is a phrase that is so hard to respond to, but I hear it so often that I have had to find a way.  And the only way I can is with compassion. 

I understand. 

It did cost a lot. 

It might have involved saving up to buy that piece.

It might have involved going without in another area of your life to purchase it.

It might have been the first item you were able to buy without using a credit card.

It might have been something your parents saved & scraped for & then it was passed on to you.

All of those memories and all of those feelings are wrapped up in your decision to let go of the piece.  It’s hard!

I understand and then I offer a small shift of perspective. 

What is it costing you now?  Does it take up space that you’d like to use in an other way?  Do you walk past it each day and get an uneasy feeling because of how that item makes you feel?  What value is it bringing to your life if it never gets used?

The other question that you may not have asked yourself is “could this item be of better service to someone else?”  Often when you donate or sell your items they will be used by someone that has been searching for that exact thing.  Something that is just lying around in your house could be put to good use if you let it go. 

It’s not easy.  It takes courage to detach from what the item “cost” & think about the item’s value in a different way, but you can do it & once you do, the relief will be worth it. 

Surround yourself with things that you use, love, & that make sense with how you live your life. Then, each item you own will be valuable- no matter what they cost.

Your Turn…

Remember that things are not memories.  When you let go of the physical item you don’t have to lose the memory.  If you are concerned that you might, take a picture of the item or write a little note about the item & what it meant to you.  The story behind the item is where it’s true value lies.

Next Steps…

Offering yourself permission to let go can be hard when your brain wants to keep reminding you of the “perceived value” of an item.  You don’t have to do it alone.  Talk over your hard decisions with a friend or be in touch & let me know what is holding you back.  Getting someone else’s input can decrease the pressure and make letting go easier.

Ready for some support?

So yIMG_6310 (1)ou are longing for a change, but are afraid to bring someone in to guide the process because your mess is TOO BIG, TOO SCARY, or TOO EMBARRASSING!  You are not only stuck in your space with a mess of things that you no longer want, but you are stuck in place because of fear, shame, or pride. 

I understand & want to reassure you that you are not alone.  Clutter comparison is a problem and feeling that your job is just too big or you have too big of a mess is a common dilemma. 

Every time someone opens their closet, cabinet, or storage room to give me a glimpse at what we are up against they do it with hesitation or a disclaimer to “prepare myself.”  I feel them cringe, hold their breath, and see the defeat they feel when they realize that it has gotten to this place of overwhelm. 

You are not alone. 

It happens all the time and what I want to tell you is that I am not afraid!  I am not afraid to see what is lurking in the piles, stacked behind the doors, or crammed in the drawers.  You are ready and wanting a change and I am here for you.  I will open the door and we will take a look together.  We will face the mess, breathe our way through the rough spots, set a course, make steps that lighten things up and get you to the place that feels good.  

At a time when you feel like you are alone and stuck, without the time, energy, or willpower to see things through, you will have a partner who’s only concern is supporting your journey.  My job is to be by your side to keep things in perspective, to reassure, to inspire, and to guide you.  Don’t stand still because of fear or shame.  Ask for support and let the energy of change move you to a place of renewal!

If you are ready for a change, sign up for a free 30 minute consultation that will leave you feeling inspired and ready to get started on the journey of lighter living.